True Calling
by The Child of Paradise
Summary: Tobi decides that he needs to find a new career, something that appreciates his talent, something that doesn't include a blonde guy 'sploding him every five minutes.
1. Prologue

After so many years as the happy-go-lucky member of Akatsuki and thus being constantly beaten up by Deidara, Tobi decided to pursue a different career path, one that appreciated him for his dedication. Being an Akatsuki member was also rather boring since he never got to do anything - Deidei was much too bossy, almost like a sister, and he wouldn't let Tobi capture or kill anyone! Tobi knew that people like him, people with true, raw talent, could get into any profession. But what could he do? What job would be worthy of him?

As he sat on the dilapidated couch in the Akatsuki media room, Tobi pondered that question. He hadn't really gotten out lately due to Pain's "security" issues, so he did not know that much about current affairs. He looked around the room for inspiration, but all he saw were the old fooseball table that Itachi's purple My Little Pony (life sized) glaring at him from across the room. Every time he saw that darn thing, Tobi wanted to go hug it. But then he remembered what happened the last time he did that… Itachi wasn't being a good boy.

Tobi's eyes wandered to the TV. Usually, his eyes were glazed over, not really paying attention to what was on, unless it was _Ugly Betty _of course, but he noticed something this time. A commercial was coming on, and Tobi glued his eyes to the screen:

"DO **YOU **WANT TO BE FAMOUS? ARE YOU BORED OF THAT BORING LIFE YOU LEAD? Then why don't you come and be part of the SHINOBI STARZ TALENT SEARCH! This Saturday and Sunday, only, at the Abandoned Shack Center, from seven in the morning to ten at night! This is **your **chance to do something with your life!"

Tobi's eyes popped. This was exactly what he was looking for! He rummaged around the room for a paper and pen to write down the information. The ASC wasn't far from where he was! He could make it. As long as none of the other Akatsuki caught him in the act… When Tobi heard the door knob turn, he immediately pressed the power button on the remote and lay down on the couch, acting as natural as possible. Hidan walked into the room.

"Uh, Tobi, why the hell are you laying on the couch naked?!"

To be continued!

**A/N: I hope you guys like where this is going! I will update the first chapter before the end of the week. =) Reviews are love!**


	2. I

**A/N: I am really a depressing person at heart, so in advance, I apologize for my lame humor. Dx **

Tobi woke up with a throbbing head... that beating he got from Hidan for sleeping on the couch naked, again, really hurt. He rubbed his head and took in the surroundings. Where was he again? Oh, right, the media room. He glanced at the clock and realized it was already the next day, Thursday! He had only two more days to get ready. Tobi sprung up from the couch to practice his audition act for the talent search, but then he groaned as he realized he still didn't have any clothes on. Where was a man supposed to find a decent source of Akatsuki robes these days? He threw on some colorless pajamas lying by the DVD case. Laundry was supposed to be Kisame's job – he was experienced with water, but he was always too lazy to do more than give them all a blast of water in the face. So it always ended up that everyone had to do his own laundry (except Kakuzu since he paid people to do it for him).

Humming on his way to the Ataksuki Laundry Room of Doom, Tobi made sure to smile really wide as he passed his comrades. Too bad they never smiled back. After all the things they had been through together, Tobi still wasn't accepted as one of _them_. Walking by Itachi's bedroom, his smile immediately dropped and almost dropped the laundry basket when he saw Kakuzu whispering to Itachi, the two of them gazing intently at something in Itachi's hands. Oh, why couldn't he share in those secrets as well! The last time Tobi had gotten that close to Itachi was when they were getting their Akatsuki photos taken.

Tobi finished up his laundry with a sad face. Unfortunately, no one could tell that he was sad because of the mask. When Konan walked in with her laundry, she had her trademark cold smile plastered on her face, expecting Tobi to say something stupid. But Tobi just looked up at her and dropped his head again. Pain didn't even appreciate the way he never, not once, looked at what was in Konan's laundry basket – unlike Hidan, who had very prying eyes.

He trudged back to his room while the clothes were in the spin cycle. Tobi's little escapade to the laundry room had only made him sadder and more sure of his decision to leave the Akatsuki. What use was he to these people who had everything? He relished in the prospect of being appreciated, of being _noticed_! A smile lit up his face for the first time in fifteen minutes. Tobi walked over to his full length mirror, and stared intently at his reflection. He started whispering his words of encouragement.

"I will show them! I will become one of the best actors out there! I will _make _Itachi and Deidara and all those who had doubted me realize how valuable I am. I will become someone important. I will be as great as Pain-sama!"

**~ FIVE HOURS LATER ~**

Tobi was very thankful for eBay. He had just bought a new suit – what kind of weirdo would wear that hideous robe in public – with next day shipping, and he was now scanning for new shoes. Appearances were everything if he wanted to make a great impression on the talent agents. In fact, he had even stalked Itachi for the past few hours, learning the ways of a stereotypical prettyboy.

It was not as easy as it had seemed at first, and Tobi was surprised at how much hair factored into the lives of those kinds of people. Tobi had not known to jerk his head around to swish his hair in a provocative manner every few minutes. Apparently, Itachi also woke up a few hours earlier every day to straighten his hair. He also didn't know growing hair out was attractive to the ladies, but he wouldn't be able to get a mullet like Itachi's for a while. A buzz cut would have to do. Tobi was a little insecure about his mask, but he didn't want to reveal his secret identity. He hoped that it gave him an air of mystery, like Batman, hopefully. There were lots of great masked roles out there for a talented person like himself. With every second he had spent stalking Itachi, Tobi had grown more confident of his own abilities. He was sure to land a great role!

But now he just needed to work on his singing. He paced around his room, trying to remember a song. But all he knew were "The Akatsuki Campfire Song" and "Jingle Bells". No one would want to hear those! He contemplated going to Kakuzu for help – he had a great singing voice, but he decided to instead look up music on the internet. The major difference was Kakuzu came with tentacles, and the internet did not.

He found some tunes that were decent enough, and he sat in front of his mirror again to practice. First, he made silly faces, which no one could see, to loosen up, and then he let his voice out.

"Oh baby, baby  
Oh baby, baby  
Ah, yeah, yeah  
Oh baby, baby  
How was I supposed to know  
Oh pretty baby  
I shouldn't have let you go  
I must confess, that my loneliness  
Is killing me now  
Don't you know I still believe  
That you will be here  
And give me a sign  
HIT ME BABY ONE MORE TIME!"

When he finished his warbling, Tobi was very pleased with himself. People would love this song! Tobi realized that his mask made his singing voice sound raspy and low, but that would be good if he got the role of a villain or depressed person, like Lord Voldemort or something. He sighed contentedly and noticed how nice chapped his hands were.

"Hmm, I should go get some moisturizer for this." Tobi went to get his special formulaic hand cream that had been he had recently stolen from some Konoha Hyuuga kid. It smelled really good, like how hair smells fresh from the shower… Tobi spent the next thirty minutes being surprised at how soft and _smooth_ his hands had become. "Wow! I have got to shake hands with those audition people now! With these angelic hands, I'm sure to get a great role!"

Tobi looked at the clock and saw that it was already eight at night. He would need to get some sleep if he were to concentrate, so he snuggled into his bed, still wearing some stranger's pajamas.

**~*~**

A dark shadow left the corner of Tobi's room as Tobi drifted into la-la-land. It was gone as quick as it had come, and it had heard, seen, and experienced everything. It knew about Tobi's treachery, and it probably did not like it. _You _do not leave the Akatsuki. You can die trying, but in the end, the Akatsuki always ends up killing you. But the thing that bothered the shadow the most was how great Tobi's singing was. It was not natural, really. It was even _more _disturbed by how much it wanted to hold Tobi's hands… mmm… soft hands… The shadow quickly abandoned those thoughts to think of more evil things, like killing bunnies.


	3. II

During the night at exactly 2AM (… If only it were 2PM *fangirl sigh*), Tobi's package arrived by FedEx Express to the Akatsuki Mailbox of Vengeance. Konan, who took care of the postal affairs based on her knowledge of paper (and because no one else wanted to be woken up in the middle of the night for those mysterious packages), glared and swore at the deliveryman as she snatched the box from him because she had to be woken up from a very nice dream about Nagato. That poor man's family never did find out what happened to him.

Konan was confused as to why Tobi would need a pre-owned pinstripe Armani suit and shiny black shoes, but she asked no questions when she had signed it off. _It's better to just leave men to themselves_, she thought. She remembered the last time she had asked any of her "comrades" what they did when she wasn't around…

**FLASHBACK – CUE EERIE MUSIC AND FOG**

_Konan was walking around the Akatsuki compound in the dark of night, fulfilling her duty as the Thursday sentry, when she heard —_

Actually, Konan hated thinking about what happened afterwards so much that she just stopped her memory right there. You wouldn't want to know either (and the audience shudders).

**END FLASHBACK.**

So Konan yawned and put the package in front of Tobi's room. _He better make good use of this. I did not almost think about Hidan's… fetishes for nothing._ She made her way back to her room, brooding over the fact that Nagato was in one of his moods and wouldn't share a room with her. _Men. I should have stayed in college. _

**~ LATER IN THE MORNING ~**

Tobi was woken up from his delicious dream about strawberry shortcakes by Deidara's screaming. _Oh great. Who stole his blowdryer this time? _He moaned at the thought of another morning spent trekking around through all the rooms to look for that stupid "Silverwind Technology" thing. But then he jumped up from bed as he remembered that it was the big day, _his_ day. There would be no more being Deidara's lackey! He could be his own man, his own boss. Tobi smiled his invisible smile and got dressed.

He realized that he still didn't have the clothes he ordered on eBay, so he opened his door to go and get his package, which should have arrived overnight. Tobi grinned with delight as he saw the package was already there, neatly laying by his door. Konan was such a sweetheart for leaving it in front of his door instead of the usual accidental drop off in the Monster Pit. He would be sure to thank her once he became a star.

Once he had put the suit and shoes on, Tobi felt very satisfied with himself. He looked, well, great! Even _better_ than Itachi, really. He was very excited to go to the audition as his new, attractive self. The whole outfit had cost him almost all of his savings, and Kakuzu had been suspicious as to why he would need all that money. But he could forget about all those petty Akatsuki affairs. Now, it was his time to shine, his turn to have people look at him and be in awe of his elegance, his charisma, his utter wonder. This was going to be one of the best days of his life.

Now, if only he could figure out how to sneak off without being noticed…

Tobi decided that the best thing to do would to wait for the lunch break when they usually left for their own favorite restaurants in the surrounding villages. His was a while of a run, so the rest of the Akatsuki would not mind if he were gone for the afternoon, especially Konan, based on the last time he had gotten lost on his way back (the forests were tricky). _You'd think women would care more about men. Hmph._He was grateful that the next Jinchuuriki mission wouldn't be for another week or so because things would be a lot more stressful then. So he spent his morning cooped up in his room, practicing his poses, singing, and sheer awesomeness skills.

When lunch time came along, Tobi nonchalantly strode out of his room and down the hallways of the underground lair. He tried to look as innocent as possible, which was quite simple since no one could see his face. But still, he felt like it had been forever after he made it to the dining room where one of the exit doors was. Of course, no one paid attention to him. When did they ever? They didn't even notice that he was wearing a suit! Some friends. They were all sitting together around one of the corner tables, completely avoiding his gaze. This was even worse than the first time he ran around naked… It was hard to imagine that Hidan could be even scarier than usual. Tobi started to walk faster, and he held his head higher. They would see. Yes, they would realize him as a truly great man. He opened the door with a creak, everything dead silent, and just left. No one said anything, no one even looked at him, and so he left the room with a slightly dejected state of mind.

Surrounding the Akatsuki Base was a large forest of ancient redwoods. Tobi took in a breath of fresh air as he mentally prepared for his short journey. He was going to become someone after this. His comrades would respect him. It was worth more than anything to him. He was going to do this. He closed his eyes and set off, the heart of the ancient forest in his own.

After much running and other deployments of his ninja skills through the forest, Tobi finally got to the Abandoned Shack Center – and with not a scratch on his suit or shoes, either. The idiot that had named such a wondrous place obviously was playing a joke or something. How could that colossal, shiny building be a shack? He stopped and stared in awe at the magnificent entertainment center from the privacy of the trees.

ASC was comprised of glass, a giant greenhouse, almost. The light shined off of the hundreds of slick glass panels, blinding anyone nearby. Of course, Tobi was unaffected as he had a mask. He noticed how well-kept the lawn was, the thousands of daffodils dancing in the breeze around the building, like a skirt of yellow. His jaw dropped as he brought his head down from the glass and saw how many other people were there! The last thing he needed was more competition! But as he scanned the crowd, he realized that he was the only one with a mask – unique. This wouldn't be so bad, right?

Tobi gathered his courage and walked out from under the trees. He held his head up high and marched to the wide front doors with dignity (people liked dignity, right?).

But before he could take a single step through those shiny silver doors, he heard some yelling behind him. As he turned his head, a rock hit him. Tobi fell to the ground in darkness.

"… Wha… what happened?" Tobi's eyes fluttered as he lay on the dirt. His gaze met a pair of long, smooth, _silky_ legs. If only he had the strength to lift his head and see who this beautiful person was… Fortunately, she lowered her own head to meet his. Tobi had a sharp intake of breath as he saw how lovely this lady was. She had long, silver hair that shined even brighter than the glass walls beside her. Tobi wasn't good with ages since the only woman he was around was Konan, who never told anyone how old she was, so the best he could think about this gentle creature was that she was young, a young sapling… Her azul blue eyes shined with ambition, and Tobi saw his own redemption in them. Was this love? Could a person who had no face love instantly love someone with such a beautiful one? He thought so, he thought nothing. It was one of those moments that seemed to last forever, and he just stared.

"Hey you bastard, don't you know not to cut the line? Be glad I only threw a rock at you and not something heavier." She walked off with a huff, leaving Tobi in a daze. _Wow, I wonder who she is!_

Someone tapped Tobi on the shoulder, and he turned to see who it was. A dashing, yes dashing, young man with lank blonde hair was offering his hand to the fallen Tobi. He pulled him up, and Tobi said the appropriate thank you.

"Who was that girl? She was so…"

"Annoying? Bitchy? Yeah, that's Yumeno. She looks sweet, but she's got the fangs of a vampire. You shouldn't mess with her – she's here to get the main part, and that's all she cares about."

"Oh. I'll remember that. I'm Tobi. What's your name?" Tobi noticed that the other man was tall and thin, the kind of attractive person Itachi was. _Itachi…_

"I'm Natsu, from the Hidden Mist. Where are you from? We'd better get back in the line, before we lose our place." The two made their place in line, which was rather far back. Tobi noticed how everyone else's hair was in the same, long style Natsu's was. _How girly._

"Oh, uh, I'm from… the Hidden Sand, yeah, Gaara and that, uh-huh… How do you know Yumeno, by the way?" Tobi was thankful that Natsu wouldn't be able to see his red cheeks. He was not the best at lying.

"That's pretty far off! The story of Yumeno and I is a long one, but basically…. we had… relations, before her mother died, and she became _that. _Let's not dwell on those past events, though. Are you hoping to get a lead? I was going to try out for one, but I know that Yumeno will get the opposite role, and I don't know if I want to be by her again." He laughed knowingly. Tobi was starting to feel belittled, like he wasn't good enough. What was he to such a wondrous man? Tobi could tell that Natsu was going to get some great part..

"This is my first time at an audition. I'm not sure if I will get anything good, though." Tobi and his new friend moved up the line a bit. "Will this take long? What could they be doing in there?"

"Oh wow, you must really be new to this! When you first go in, you have to give them your ID and some head shots – like this." Natsu pulled out a few slick photos of himself in attractive poses. They were very professional, something you pay a lot of money to get. Tobi's heart fell as he knew that he had nothing like that. "Don't worry, though. Even if you don't have your pics, you can still impress them with your singing and acting. I'm going to be singing the tenor part the phantom has in Phantom of the Opera – I'm hoping to get a good role in the reproduction of that play." Tobi tried to smile knowingly, but it was not working. How could he compete with such a _real _actor? And then there was that Yumeno girl – she would be competition as well. He was already intimidated enough by Natsu's hair and height. Maybe this wasn't the best idea...

"Alright, next up!" In his intense pondering, Tobi had not noticed that they had reached the front of the line. A large man with shady glasses pushed him through those previously closed wide silver doors. Tobi stared at the splendor that was the ASC's inside. The walls were all glass and clear, so he could see people working in each office and cubicle. There were no secrets in the entertainment agency, right? Various potted plants lined the walls, and there were even a few palm trees in the center of the main foyer room. The light shining down from the glass ceiling was like real, natural light. Tobi felt like he was in a sort of wonderland, a dream. This was obviously a high end place. Tobi heard a sharp snap behind him, and he turned around to look at the imposing man who had made it.

"HEY YOU! Take off that mask! We can't have masked people here. NOW, and I mean YOU."


End file.
